Love Someday.

When I first heard of the book Twilight written by Stephenie Meyer, I wasn’t amazed at all for a friend criticized it as a piece of crap, a story of boredom, a lousy love affair between two leading characters. I wasn’t thrilled by the thought of boredom and lousy. Then as I was looking for the latest movies in youtube, I bumped into the trailer of this twilight. Dang, Rob Pattinson on leading role. Instantly, I began to take interest. I googled and yahoo’d until I found what I was looking for.

Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan were the main cast. And since Pattinson’s to portray Cullen, I prefer to talk about their clan, in the book I mean.

Edward Cullen, who was the youngest in the vampire family, was a very pale looking guy, with reddish brown hair and golden butterscotch eyes. He was born in Chicago in 1901 and lived a normal human life for 17 years until Spanish Influenza hit him. It was in summer 1918 that Carlisle, his foster father, found him. He was dying then due to the epidemic when Carlisle saved him and made him immortal. Anyway, Edward has this certain ability and only he, in their family, has it. That is to read human minds. And from where he got it, he didn’t know. He was also the fastest runner among the Cullens.

Carlisle Cullen, on the other hand, was a town physician. He was born in London in 1640s. Imagine how old he is now. He’s the only son of an Anglican pastor and his mother died giving birth to him. In his early twenties, he led hunts for witches, werewolves and vampires. And in one of those days, Carlisle was accidentally inflicted by a vampire’s venom which eventually made him one of them. He strived to find an alternative for human blood until one night, a herd of deer passed his hiding place. Animals made him immune to human blood and so he pursued medicine.

I can barely describe Esme for very little was stated about her. She was the foster mother of the Cullen youngsters. She was suicidal then for having lost his first and only child. Esme was found by Carlisle when she jumped off a cliff to die. Fortunately, she was saved by immortality.

Alice, who stood as Edward’s sister, if truth be told, caught my interest for she has no memory of her human life. But when an incident happened between Bella Swan and one of the vampire villains, her story was told.

“When the old one knew I was after his little friend, he stole her from the asylum where he worked and as soon as he freed her, he made her safe. She didn’t even seem to notice the pain, poor little creature. She’d been stuck in that black hole of a cell for so long. A hundred years earlier and she would have been burned at the stake for her visions. In the 1920s, it was the asylum and the shock texts. When she opened her eyes, strong with her fresh youth, it was like she’d never seen the sun before. The old vampire made her a strong new vampire and there was no reason for me to touch her then." James, the villain, stated talking about Alice. And one more thing about Alice, she can visualize the future.

Little was said about Emmett Cullen and Jasper and Rosalie Hale. Rosalie, who was supposedly the partner of Edward, had become the sometimes wife of Emmett. She was the only Cullen to dislike Bella, jealous of her being human, living a normal life.

Jasper, on the other hand, is Rosalie’s blonde twin brother. They were 18 years old but already with Mrs. Cullen since they were 8. He was one of the three who has extraordinary ability and that is unusual sensitivity. He can make an unpleasant atmosphere into a calm and soothing one. Emmett, the last of the Cullens, was Rosalie’s partner. Nothing much was said about him in the story.

There you have it. From the book Twilight, the vampire clan, the Cullens.

It's not always roses all the way. In most unexpected times, people who walk barefoot leave painful marks on their toes for walking in bushes full of thorns just to get to the garden of happiness. That's what you call risking.

Do you think God planned it? No, it was their choice. Having to walk through certain situations, knowing that pain is all they could ever get.

There was once this timid girl. She has gone through tragic emotions. She was suicidal, selfish and unloved. She vowed never to let another soul take a peek of her lonely, harsh world, until an angel came down from the heavens.

Once, this angel told her to wipe away all her negative ideas about life and love for he will show her what those truly mean. She has to believe. She was hesitant at first, but his eyes are more than worthy of her trust. She tasted heaven in his arms. And when she was about to give it all up to him, he vanished like a vampire in the morning.

The story was an example of trust given without asking anything in return, without the assurance of forever happiness and love. People, how much they stay away from betrayal, will always be its sweetest victim. One could never really trust what and who’s around him.

You may always want to kill the bastard who broke your heart, the thief who stole your car, the murderer who killed your family, but in the back of your minds, you never blamed them. You blame yourself; for you risk the situation just to find out that it had result to nothing, that it was your entire fault.

Hating yourself will never do you good, neither is hating the world. But in the end, you’ll realize that what you have done, may it be the wickedest of black spells, gave off a wonderful fruit far more than you imagined.

Finally, she arrived at the hospital. She slowly turned the car engine off and took out the keys. That was Thursday night. The head nurse designated her to the Special Care Unit where only one nurse was allowed to take responsibility of the patients. SCU can be spotted at the far left corner of the second floor front wing of the hospital. It always looks creepy. The thought of staying there that night alone made her shiver. Complaining was the last thing she wants to do. It’s her job anyway.

After doing the charts and rendering care, she weakly turned on the tv and sat down. She was sleepy. So she stood up again, went to her things and got her game gadget out. It always makes her awake. She was singing this certain song on MTV when someone knocked at the door. It was almost 12 midnight. Who could it possibly be? Policy’s no visitors from 9 PM to 7 AM. Some ward nurse perhaps.

She hesitated but still opened the door. Outside the unit, there stood one of the laboratory staffs. His eyes were teary, red and swollen. He was silent for a moment, maybe thinking. And then he asked her if he could come in for a conversation, an important one. He seemed desperate to talk his problems out. What a puppy! And since he is her friend, she let him in.

He sat down beside her, table at the front. He then began to talk about this girl, a friend that eventually became the one he had fallen for. The deal was the girl only treats him as a friend. He was hurt, so hurt that he can’t bear it anymore. Anyone can feel the sadness in his eyes. He then asked for a warm embrace. He hugged her even before her consent. She was astonished. His pretty brown eyes somewhat became dark with evil scheme. The good boy image turned into a real monster identity. He touched her in places most male wants to touch in females. She stood up. Startled. Speechless. Frightened.

Maybe he was just confused.

She kindly asked him to leave the unit but the laboratory guy was persistent. He held her hands and pinned her to the wall, telling her how much he loves her and begging her to love him too. She wanted to scream but she just burst in tears. He was still touching her and she was too weak to fight his strong urge. He seemed obsessed. He then began kissing her lips. Those lips that were reserved only for the man she loved all her life. She was so afraid. She started squealing unpleasant words to his face and telling him to get out of the unit before she sues him. She repeated it a hundred times over before the lab guy came to his senses. He knelt down and apologized for what he did but she was too upset to forgive him. She pushed him out the door. She was scared. She was crying. And she had not slept in two days. Her mind kept picturing the terrible experience. The second marked traumatic day of her life finally came.

Heard the story? Asked your friends, perhaps they knew.

All the hopes to be close to her, the hopes to be called one of her sissies turned into balls of shame. He is a male. I just didn’t want to believe it for when I talk to Watermelon in game, she always seems so feminine. Yes. He carried himself well. As a girl. When I later on found out that he was one of those ancient, old members of DJs who objected to have me in the club, I started to dislike him.

After the break up with Sourcream, another jockey attempted to win Butternut’s heart. DJGrapes, who was totally shattered at that time, became a very dear friend to me. I was his confidant, a shoulder to cry on. Our closeness lead to a special friendship. He fell in love. I did too. Or so I thought. But same as Sourcream's story, it didn't last long. Bitterness ate him up that until now, he blames me for all the pain he went through.

The club has a very tight bond. Opening application for new members was a risk of time. Almost everyday, the club master would hire one or two applicants. It's fun to have new friends. But still you have to choose them. For you will never know who are true and who are going to pull you down and bury you alive.

Cinnamon Rolls Went Rolling

I was beginning to get close to DJCinnamon at that time. He was the guy I never thought he is. I always tease him, telling him that I like him when I know he won't like me. It's not that Im not pretty, it's just that .. He likes somebody else. There was this one time when I was so bored, I got him to text me. And jeez, I was totally out of my mind. I uttered the magical words. Yes you know it. I told him that I love him. And whoa, I got him confused. I keep telling him that I love him when I know in myself that I was just infatuated. After a few replies, he told me that he loves me back. OMG. Is that for real? Yes it was for real.

Days passed, the online script turned into a real life love story. The jockeys were in a swimming party that time, we were drinking beer. I was crying then for I don't want to get hurt anymore. I don't want to hurt others because I am hurting. I just want to be happy. That was when I saw Cinnamon, for the very first time. Cinnamon.

TO CONTINUE.

I joined this certain club in an online game I am currently playing - Audition Dance Battle Philippines. Club DJ, who welcomed me warmly, was one of the most known clubs in Audition. It came to life on the first month of 2007, closed beta period.


I came to know the club while I was browsing the pages of E-games forums. I was a member of l'Esprit du Clan back then when I decided to join Club DJ.

Why?

• First, my clan was bringing up the rear, besides, it was fresh and we only had few members.
• Second, I was mesmerized by the colorful banners and signatures Club DJ has.
• Third, it was famed.
  

It took nights, bread, when I finally had the guts to approach their club master, DJLhime. Fortunately, and I mean so fortunately, application to join the club was open. They needed members. So after I passed my application, they put me up for an interview with DJTaro and DJChocolate. The interview almost took two hours. I could still recall how sick I was at that time and my nose was bleeding then. At last, I was accepted, I was officially a Club DJ member.

That was January 2008, new members were obliged to modify their former in game names into flavor/spice/fruit names like that of DJWatermelon's and other DJs. And the chosen name must start with the letters D and J, capitalized. I was recognized as jeihzie for a year before I changed my in game name into DJButternut.

Butternut. The History.


Chopsueyrice, one of my closest friends in E-games Forums has become my constant text and chatmate. He knew about everything I went through. My rants, my joy, my heartaches. He was happy for me when I told him that I was going to join one of the well known clubs online. When the DJs accepted me as their member, Chops, as what i call him, helped me think of a food name I can use as an in game name. We came up with Lollipop, Cream, Berries etc etc. When we finally agreed in Butternut. He got it from a flavor of Dunkin Donuts' Donuts. That color orange shaped in a letter O thing-y. A day after our conversation, jeihzie was, for the record, became DJButternut from then on.

The first time I showed up with the jockeys in the dancefloor, my heart was freakin' racing. What if's filled my mind like plague. What if they dont like me? What if some of them are rude, mean, cruel? What if I'm not really welcome? What if? What if?

TO CONTINUE ...

Intro

This girl has been acquainted to pain since she entered college. That was the very first time she thought that life never really is good. She thought she was strong, that she can brave anything that comes her way ... until she fell in love.

What Exactly Is Heartbreak?

Lots of things can cause heartbreak. Some people might have had a romantic relationship that ended before they were ready. Others might have strong feelings for someone who doesn't feel the same way. Or maybe a person feels sad or angry when a close friend ends or abandons the friendship. Although the causes may be different, the feeling of loss is the same — whether it's the loss of something real or the loss of something you only hoped for. People describe heartbreak as a feeling of heaviness, emptiness, and sadness.

How Can I Deal With How I Feel?

Most people will tell you you'll get over it or you'll meet someone else, but when it's happening to you, it can feel like no one else in the world has ever felt the same way. If you're experiencing these feelings, there are things you can do to lessen the pain. Here are some tips that might help:

• Share your feelings. Some people find that sharing their feelings with someone they trust — someone who recognizes what they're going through — helps them feel better. That could mean talking over all the things you feel, even having a good cry on the shoulder of a comforting friend or family member. Others find they heal better if they hang out and do the things they normally enjoy, like seeing a movie or going to a concert, to take their minds off the hurt. If you feel like someone can't relate to what you're going through or is dismissive of your feelings, find someone more sympathetic to talk to. (OK, we know that sharing feelings can be tough for guys, but you don't necessarily have to tell the football team or your wrestling coach what you're going through. Talk with a friend or family member, a teacher, or counselor. It might make you more comfortable if you find a female family member or friend, like an older sister or a neighbor, to talk to.)

• Remember what's good about you. This one is really important. Sometimes people with broken hearts start to blame themselves for what's happened. They may be really down on themselves, exaggerating their faults as though they did something to deserve the unhappiness they're experiencing. If you find this happening to you, nip it in the bud! Remind yourself of your good qualities, and if you can't think of them because your broken heart is clouding your view, get your friends to remind you.

• Take good care of yourself. A broken heart can be very stressful so don't let the rest of your body get broken too. Get lots of sleep, eat healthy foods, and exercise regularly to minimize stress and depression and give your self-esteem a boost.

• Don't be afraid to cry. Going through a break-up can be really tough, and getting some of those raw emotions out can be a big help. We know this is another tough one for guys, but there's no shame in crying now and then. No one has to see you do it — you don't have to start blubbering in class or at soccer practice or anything. Just a find a place where you can be alone, like crying into your pillow at night or in the shower when you're getting ready for the day.

• Do the things you normally enjoy. Whether it's seeing a movie or going to a concert, do something fun to take your mind off the negative feelings for a while.

• Keep yourself busy. Sometimes this is difficult when you're coping with sadness and grief, but it really helps. This is a great time to redecorate your room or try a new hobby. That doesn't mean you shouldn't think about what happened — working things through in our minds is all part of the healing process — it just means you should focus on other things too.

• Give yourself time. It takes time for sadness to go away. Almost everyone thinks they won't feel normal again, but the human spirit is amazing — and the heartbreak almost always heals after a while. But how long will that take? That depends on what caused your heartbreak, how you deal with loss, and how quickly you tend to bounce back from things. Getting over a break-up can take a couple of days to many weeks — and sometimes even months.

Some people feel that nothing will make them happy again and resort to alcohol or drugs. Others feel angry and want to hurt themselves or someone else. People who drink, do drugs, or cut themselves to escape from the reality of a loss may think they are numbing their pain, but the feeling is only temporary. They're not really dealing with the pain, only masking it, which makes all their feelings build up inside and prolongs the sadness.

Sometimes the sadness is so deep — or lasts so long — that a person may need some extra support. For someone who isn't starting to feel better after a few weeks or who continues to feel depressed, talking to a counselor or therapist can be very helpful.

So be patient with yourself, and let the healing begin.

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Getting Over a Break up, reviewed by: Jennifer Pendley, PhD

THEY KISSED AGAIN

Sequel to the 2005 smash hit It Started With a Kiss

Chinese Title: 'E Zuo Ju Er Wen' (literally, prank's second kiss)
Year: 2008
No. of episodes: 20
Theme song: Mavis Fan (ending song - Ni ('You') by Ariel Lin and interlude by Joe Cheng)
Based on the manga Itazaru Na Kiss ("prank's kiss") by Kaoru Tada

Best Moments & Lines

- Episode 11 in its entirety
- When ZS is sitting by himself on the bench after his farewell to his family and XQ before departing for the military. The image of him, alone and looking/caressing XQ's picture on his cellphone was moving beyond words. I nearly bursted into tears.
- "I'm the king of the world! You jump, I jump!" - Ariel was damn funny in that scene.
- "She doesn't seem to understand just how much I love her." - Zhi Shu in a heart-to-heart with XQ's dad. I'm glad XQ overheard this.

- "Like a broken record, she kept telling me that she loved me...it was so annoying. But when this became a regular part of my life and I took it for granted, she suddenly told me she didn't love me anymore. I can still clearly remember the nauseating feeling I had [when she said that]...I can do 90% of the things in this world. The other 10%, she can do, in a way that no one else can." - ZS explaining to YS how he fell in love with XQ.

- "I can't imagine how you would live if I weren't by your side. That is probably why I'm so strict with you. I don't know how long I can be with you in this lifetime, so even if I'm not with you one day, you must live on bravely". - ZS' narration while leaving for the military.

- The episode where the past and personality of XQ's mom is revealed.
- "The most important thing is, I love you. I love you so much. Anything that comes from you, I will love. Be it beautiful, ugly, normal or odd... as long as it comes from you, I will love it". Hands-down the most romantic line uttered in the whole series. How far ZS has come. I nearly melted on the spot.

The Loot Bag

1) The love nest. The doped-up house is fantastic, I'd want to live there! And their blog actually exists in real life! A clever idea to market and promote this series.
2) The acting.

3) There's at least one kiss in every episode, except the one when ZS treats XQ like dirt during their tension about Qi Tai.
4) A lot of funny scenes. The director is actually in a lot of them, plus he likes to include a lot of NG clips in the final cut.

5) Episode 11, which was an explosive episode in terms of emotions and character revelations. A lot of best moments were in this episode.

6) Incredibly creative connections to ISWAK without flashback overload. For example, in the finale, in the scene where ZS asks XQ if she's pregnant, he's wearing the same sweater he wore on their first unofficial date in ISWAK! I was also estatic with ZS' office decorations. I was praying that the bakery model that XQ made for his birthday would make a re-appearance and it did, along with the love letter and the good luck charm she gave him! Amazing! Finally something to show XQ that he was in love with her for almost as long as she was with him. And how freakin' cute was the button ring?!

The Barf Bag

1) Back in ISWAK, XQ was pretty uncomfortable whenever ZS teased her about physical intimacy (even though she was head over heels in love), so I found it shady that in TKA, they slept together on the last night of their honeymoon. I have to ask, would XQ have agreed to sleeping together if she knew they weren't legally married? The writers glided over this point and I can't shake the feeling that XQ might not have agreed to sleeping together if they weren't married.

2) How rude Yu Shu is. Terrible parenting skills displayed by the Jiangs.
3) The bastardization of the nursing profession. I understand that this is supposedly a romantic comedy, but is anyone going to trust a nurse after watching XQ and her antics in nursing school and the hospital? She cried in an operating room, for god's sake!

4) Too many soliloquies. I can't count how many times characters gave huge, long speeches as if they were about to die. One example was Ah Bu's speech about his love for Chun Mei at the hospital.

5) The brief but idiotic moment when ZS is introduced to Christine and says (in English) "Hi, I'm Joe. What's up?" and Christine replies "Good!". Who the hell replies 'good' to 'what's up'?!!? Who scripted this sad English? I almost died laughing.

6) How ZS still calls XQ 'idiot'. I find that verbally abusive and I cringed everytime.
7) People come in and out of the series way too quickly. I understand that the focus is on XQ and ZS, but the snippets of other people made other characters seem like caricatures, and didn't allow for some meaningful subplots. It's a good thing Ariel and Joe are such terrific actors, otherwise I would be begging for more subplots.

Eyes of a Hawk

- In the episode where XQ goes to Ma Tzu to visit ZS and she falls down and he tends to her ankle - look - they're wearing matching shoes!

Through the Grapevine

Forums are abuzz about the possible real-life relationship between Ariel and Joe. What we do know is (and they've said in interviews) that they call each other "lao gong" (husband) and "lao po" (wife) in real life. Ariel has said in an interview that while preparing for this series, she watched an American TV show on doctors and quickly called Joe and said "Lao gong, there's a show on TV about doctors! Quick! Watch and learn how to be a doctor!" I find this both telling and interesting given the fact that the two characters in the series don't even call each other that - they just call each other by name. Recent interviews also indicate that they may just come out and admit their relationship very soon.

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Credits to Bridget for the review.

People always tell me how I should be careful with my words, how I should act my age. They dictate me what to do, as if they know me more than I ever know myself. And it’s hard when all you ever wanted was to free yourself from their chains. They will always run after you and pull your neck with a rope, you have a choice but you are not bound to choose because you’re their slave. You have no capability of deciding. It’s as if you will ruin everything if you won’t follow the rules, if you won’t listen. It’s either you’ll take their advice, do the right thing, break your own heart and make them happy or believe in what you believe in, proof them wrong and be happy about it.

What really is the right thing to do? Not to hurt others but instead hurt your self? Make others happy and leave yourself in misery? What do you think is right?

People don’t have to slave people just because they think they’re inferior. They go walking the streets with a sign that says I’m Mr. Know-it-all. It makes them happy yeah, obviously. What is right for them may not be right for others. But do we have to comment on what they do? Do we have to spot their every single mistake just because we claim that we know the right thing? If we do what other heartless creatures do, then we’d be just like them. Cold. Distant. Tainted.

Let’s act for a reason. Not just because we are bound to do it but because we want to do it and because it will make you, them and everybody happy. Have your own decision. Don’t always depend on what they say. Besides, we are born alone. Strong and independent.

2005

For the longest time after what had happened in the last one and a half year, she decided to go out in a serene place by herself. It was the first time she did that, no friends to chat with, and no family to talk to, just her alone. The cool atmosphere blended the thoughts she was thinking. ‘How on earth did I ever betray my parents, my family?’ It was a realization indeed that what had happened in the past couple of months was, as they say, immaturity. She ran away from home. She was blinded by love.

‘Im 18. They shouldn’t dictate me what to do.’ As she always tells herself. And at that time, reality set in. She knew she was wrong but her pride refused to admit it.

What is maturity?

Maturity is the ability to control anger and settle differences without violence or destruction.
Maturity is patience. It is the willingness to pass up immediate pleasure in favor of the long-term gain. Maturity is perseverance, the ability to sweat out a project or a situation in spite of heavy opposition and discouraging set-backs. Maturity is the capacity to face unpleasantness and frustration, discomfort and defeat, without complaint or collapse.

Maturity is humility. It is being big enough to say, "I was wrong." And, when right, the mature person need not experience the satisfaction of saying, "I told you so."

Maturity means dependability, keeping one's word, coming through in a crisis. The immature are masters of the alibi. They are the confused and the disorganized. Their lives are a maze of broken promises, former friends, unfinished business, and good intentions that somehow never materialize.